I’ve Been Pussy Whipped And I’m Loving It!

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What up! What up! What up my homies and homettes! On a pussy whipped note! The other day, my wife called me to let me know, that since our daughter and son usually go hangout with their friends after Christmas eve dinner, we will be heading on out to the local casino, with her mother and stepfather. I really didn’t want to go, because I don’t find any fun in gambling. But she did mentioned that I could enjoy the live entertainment, which I like because of the old school music, and she mentioned that I could have a couple of beers while I’m there. If you personally knew me, you would know that she didn’t have to say anything else after beers.

My point is, that some super-duper macho men with over inflated egos, might say that I have been pussy whipped, but that’s not the case at all. You see, since I don’t drink on a daily basis, my wife doesn’t mind me drinking on weekends since I’m off from the salt mine and I always do it at home, she just hates my binging. So what she’s telling me is, that it is OK for me to have a couple of beers on special occasions, but not every weekend. So if my wife taking care of me is being pussy whipped, then I guess I am, AND I’M LOVING IT! Whaahh-psssh!

As always, wherever you are in this crazy planet of ours, good morning, good afternoon, good evening or good night. I hope that you are enjoying it or have enjoyed it to the fullest.

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!

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Going Back To Basics

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Photo by Paula Schmidt on Pexels.com

I know! I know! I know! I know! I know! It has been a couple of days since I last posted on this here crazy, insane and boring blog for mine. It is a long story, but you might already know me… or not… But I always like to make them short, sweet and to the point.

The whole thing was that 1) I have two herniated disks in my lower back and I did a couple of things I should not have done over the long weekend, so my back went out and I have been out of work and at home taking pain meds, until I go back to the salt mine next Monday and 2) My wife and I have been spending more time together, because even if we give each other some space, we both felt that we were not spending enough time together. So there you have it my loyal 1.5 readers.

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!

I Give Her Space

I have to say, that the other morning, I was fortunate enough to catch an extraordinary story about 96-year-old U.S. District Judge Honorable Robert W. Sweet. But since I know you have a life and better shits to do, I’ll make this story nice, short and like the judge… Sweet. Twice a week to stay fit, he is coached by an Olympic ice dancer. But the thing that really got my attention was, when he tells the story as to why he doesn’t skate with his wife, even though she’s the avid ice dancing fan who gave him the skates as a birthday gift, when he was in his 70’s.

Anyways, my point is, that even though my wife and I have been together for 31 years, I always make sure that she has her space. Why? Because the same way that I have my hobby and interests that she doesn’t give a flying fuck about, she has her own interests and things that I don’t give a flying fuck about either. I’ve heard of some men who are offended when their wives or girlfriends ask for some space. But I think that they feel like that, because they take it the wrong way. That never happened with me, because I always knew, that no matter how much a couple loves each other, it doesn’t mean that they have to be together 24/7/365. Food for thought my homies and homettes… food for thought. 

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!

Tony’s Not So Expert Advice

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First things first my hermanos and hermanas from another madre! Wherever you are in this crazy, funny, insane, strange, weird and all put together in an unlabeled bottle, planet of ours, good morning, good afternoon, good evening or good night. As always, enjoy it to the fullest and do not to let nobody fuck it up for you no matter what happens. Also, remember to be yourself, but keep in mind, not to be a dick or an asshole to others, because we are already filled to capacity with those and we won’t be able to handle another one.

On a sober note! Today is Saturday November 17, 2018 and that means that I have been sober for four months and thirty days or even better yet, one hundred fifty-two days in total. I have to say, that sobriety has really helped me deal with my anxiety, bipolar II disorder, depression and OCD. I really feel fucking great!

For those of you out there in the blogosphere, AKA my loyal 1.5 readers, who might not know it, my wife and I officially started dating exactly on October 2, 1987 (She has made sure that I never forget that date). Back then she was fifteen and I was seventeen. As a matter of fact, just last month, on October 2, 2018, we celebrated our thirty-first anniversary. Woo-Hoo!

Hey look, to be honest with you, we are proud, happy and still very much in love after all these years. But just like any other young couple, at first we had a lot of ups and downs. But trust me, I don’t regret anything, because as we were getting used to being young parents and living together, we learned a lot about each other.

As you might know by now, I’m no expert, but there are a few things that I can tell young couples, that I wished I was told back in the days, but was not.

  1. Respect each another.
  2. Trust each other.
  3. If something about you is bothering your partner, listen, then fix it.
  4. If something about your partner is bothering you, say something, because humans can’t read minds.
  5. Once is a mistake. Twice is a pattern. Three times is a habit.
  6. Nobody wears the so-called pants in the home.
  7. Regardless of sex and or income, a relationship is 50/50.
  8. It takes two people to procreate babies and also two to take care of them.
  9. Always include your partner in every decision, no matter how meaningless, you might think it is.
  10. If you didn’t understand something that your partner did or say, say something.
  11. Value your partner’s opinion and input, don’t dismiss them, just because.
  12. Put yourself in your partner’s shoes.
  13. Be open-minded.

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!