June Session With My Shrink

woman in white shirt standing near glass window inside room
Photo by Oles kanebckuu on Pexels.com

Today after work, I will be seeing my shrink Dr. C. The whole thing is a good thing and a bad thing at the same time. Why is it a good thing? Because even though I only see him once a month, I really enjoy talk therapy, and when I leave his office, I feel like if a thousand pounds were lifted off of my shoulders. Why is it a bad thing? Because my wife called him last week and talked to him about my weekend binge drinking, which he already knows about, but I don’t know what my wife had told him. I did called him yesterday, to confirm our session on June 14th and I asked him if in fact, my wife had called him, at which time he said yes.

The thing is, that when I started to see him around eight years ago, I signed a paper, that says, that he can give my wife any information that she requests. Why? Because I have been with her for so many years, that she might actually know me better than… ME! To be honest, I’m not nervous, because I really like him and I have always liked the way that he treats and works with me. I just hope that I don’t get sent to the loony bin though. Fingers crossed. Bwahahahahaha!

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!

My Dreaded Wednesday


First things first my peeps! Wherever you are in this crazy planet of ours today, I hope that you are having a good morning, good afternoon, good evening or good night. As always, enjoy your hump day to the fullest and don’t let nobody fuck it for you.

On a I hate what I’m doing today at work note! Today is Wednesday and I am doing what I hate the most about my job… being on the phone the whole day. Don’t get me wrong, I really do like my job, but I guess, that after working for around two years in the call center, I was left traumatized. Even though the majority of the calls that we get in our department right now are simple ones and mostly from government agencies, there are still those few dreaded ones. Another thing is, that I can’t take as many smoke breaks as I usually do. Also my lunch break schedule is changed, from whenever I want to take it, to whenever they schedule me to take it, which sucks BIG time. But… I really can’t complain, at least I have a job that pays the bills. Which unfortunately, is something that a lot of people around this crazy planet of ours, can’t say right now. Oh well, I’ll just have to wait until I’m schedule to do what I really love about my job… which is working on the incoming email and faxes. All that I can say is that… It is what it is and I am not going to let it fuck up my day… no matter what goes down.

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!

Just Jump In Front Of A Train!

shallow focus photo of train rail
Photo by Johannes Plenio on Pexels.com

What up! What up! What up! What up y’all! Happy Tuesday and I hope that wherever you are, you are having a great morning, afternoon, evening or night. Enjoy it to the fullest and don’t let nobody fuck it up for you no matter what happens. Always keep it really real my peeps. On a sober note… Today marks my eight sober day and I feel fucking great. Last weekend was my first sober weekend in a while and I’m begging for more like it.

On another intrusive and violent OCD thought Note? Every time that I wait for the train to get to work and back home, I like to stay away from the platform edge. You see, the thing is, that sometimes I get these intrusive thoughts about jumping in front of an arriving train and getting hit. I can really see myself going through with it. It’s really fucked up, but that’s the reality of my OCD. Sometimes it gets so real, that my anxiety level goes all the way up to the top. The intrusive and violent thoughts are the only thing about my OCD, that I haven’t been able to even partially control. To be honest with you, I hate them to death, but the only thing that I can do to try to stop them is, to distract myself by doing or thinking about something else. They are just like uninvited guests, they just pop up in my mind whenever they want to and they also want to leave whenever they want to. They are just like that pesty family member of yours, that extends his/her welcome in your home.

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!